Perfectionism

Escaping an impossible mindset

I think a lot of us have an internal narrative of needing to be perfect.

If we are perfect, we will not be bad, others will like us, we won't fail, life continues.

It's a really hard mindset to escape, but here's what helped me most:

1. Reiterating to myself again and again that There. Is. No. Perfect. Even my own definitions were constantly in flux. "Perfect" was never really achievable.

2. Reminding myself (again over and over) that I am Enough. And that's okay. Being enough is okay. Lots of people are enough, and lots of them are happy and successful. You are enough and that's already pretty good!

3. Opposite evidence. If I find my brain focusing on my screw ups, I intentionally force myself to think of something that went right. If I'm telling myself I need 100%, I ask what would happen if I actually got 80%?

4. Time. It just took a lot of time to get comfortable in my skin. It happens though.

What helps you fight perfectionist tendencies?